Be Uncomfortable

In my first Life Lessons newsletter, I wrote about the very first thing we must understand if we want to change things about our life. And that fact is that beliefs are not reality, and we have the power to change our beliefs, at will. It’s a scary truth, really, but we absolutely must understand this to move forward in our life. Otherwise we’ll spend a lifetime of running through the same cycle again and again and not get very far in life.

And that leads me to the next scary truth – If we are going to change, to get to a better place, to get beyond where we are in whatever terms we want to change – better finances, a more fulfilling life, deeper relationships, we can’t keep doing the same things.

I think it was Einstein who said that the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results. Yet, that is what most of us do, clinging to our old beliefs and habits even though, if we would step back, we KNOW those old beliefs and habits got us… to where we are, over and over again.

And so, if we want to change some important element of our life, we have to change our beliefs, and change our habits.

It sounds so simple when I say it, doesn’t it? And yet, most of us don’t manage to pull it off very well. And the reason is quite simple. Change is, for most of us, pretty uncomfortable.

We’re wired to make our lives simple and secure. That need to for something to be comfortable and safe is wired into our DNA. So we build houses and nest eggs and beliefs to keep us safe from that uncomfortable feeling change brings.

On the surface, that might seem to make sense, except for one thing. Life changes. And we have a choice of directing and controlling much of that change, or having it happen to us and having to change by force.

Now, which of THOSE two choices seem safer?

So if we are going to get what we want out of life (and we don’t have it already), then we are going to have to change something, and that is uncomfortable. so what to do?

Well, this is my experience. When I gather the courage to do something different, I am uncomfortable for a short while, and then as I do it, I become more and more comfortable.

And that is not all, when I take that step into something new and different and uncomfortable, the world around us seems to pay attention. People notice. God notices. The universe notices, and things seem to fall into place to help me.

This is not wishful thinking. I’ve kept a journal for many, many years and when I go back and read it, I see this pattern happen again and again. If I am willing to sacrifice some uncomfortableness, I am rewarded with something very good that lasts long after the uncomfortableness fades. It’s been remarkably consistent. And I’ve seen it work for others, again with consistently.

And so, it can work for you. And here’s why.

It doesn’t depend on you. You don’t have to be smart enough or strong enough or anything enough, but cause this just seems to be the way the world works. Not immediately, but over time, if we are willing to change, to become a beginner at something, to deal with that uncomfortableness, the world adapts to us and lets good things, good changes, come to us.

So that’s the second life lesson we need, that change means some uncomfortableness. But if we will absorb that uncomfortableness for a bit, it pays off in a life time of better.

Scary, huh? 

Tom